MY MOTHER AND FATHER ORDER ME TO BE SOMEONE ELSE, said (shouted) a 13 year old girl.

X: "Who do they want you to be?"
Susan: "A preppie!"
X: "What's a preppie?"
Susan: "The kids that suck up to the teachers in order to get good grades, they join all the clubs, they all dress alike, they all hang out together, and they all brag that they're going to college."
Mother and Father: "Look at her! She always looks like a slob!" 
     Susan was wearing jeans with holes in the knees and a black t-shirt with weird sayings on it.
X: (to parents) "I just drove past the home of the wealthiest people in town. A 13 year old girl was out on the driveway with a garden hose, spraying off the drive. She had on jeans with holes in the knees and a black t-shirt with weird sayings on it."
     They paid no attention.
     Mom and Dad had a lot of reasons to be disgusted with their daughter.
     However, at school the teachers loved her. She was smart and creative and the teachers frequently got her to write articles in the school newspaper. She was sassy and they loved it.
     But, she refused to be a preppy.
     Three years went by. Susan told her parents to drop over at the school auditorium that night, but didn't tell them what was going on.
     Mom and Dad were shocked to see Susan sitting up on the platform with a bunch of preppies. She was being inducted into the National Honor Society, and was also receiving plaques and medals for making outstanding contributions to the school and community.
     SUSAN HAD ALWAYS BEEN A PREPPIE !

Moral: No matter how hard you try to be someone else, you're still the same old person.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE PERFECT TO BE A WINNER

     Year after year J was the winner of the national motorcycle dirt track races.
     You have to go faster than the other bikes if you want to win a race.
     There is a curve on a popular track that cannot be taken at over 90 miles per hour.
     J tries to take it at 91 miles per hour.
     But his bike can't do it. He falls, two or three bikes that had been following him run over him and his bike, and continue on their way.
     He picks up his machine, starts it, opens the throttle all the way, and comes in third.

     One year the Special Olympics was held at Notre Dame University.
     The TV reporter approached a 14 year old boy who was warming up, and asked, "Are you gonna win this race?"
     The boy said, "I might not come in first." Then, "I might not come in second." And then, "I might not come in third." "BUT, I'M STILL A NICE GUY!"

     The interviewer said to Steve Allen, "You've written all these books and songs. You're such a winner!"
    Steve said, "Just a minute. For every book I've written, I've been rejected by numerous publishers. Do you realize that LIFE IS MOSTLY LOSING?"

Moral: You don't have to be perfect to be a winner.
    

HUMAN FOIBLES

     "FALL OUT WITH YOUR BAYONETS!"

     One hundred pairs of boots go pounding out the door, everybody carrying a bayonet, and lining up at the assembly point.

     "THE ARMY HAS DECIDED TO GIVE US NEW BAYONETS. WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT TOUCH THE TIP OF THIS BAYONET. IT'S VERY, VERY SHARP.

     Everybody takes a bayonet.

     Ten seconds later, blood is running down one hundred fingers.

Discuss: Why did these men touch the tip of the new bayonet?

JACK AND JILL

     Jack and Jill were a young couple, about thirty years of age.
     Jill was standing by the sink one evening, rinsing off the dishes that were about to go into the washer, when the phone rang.
     She picked it up, and the voice said, "I hate to tell you this, but your husband is fooling around with that woman who lives down at the end of the street."
     Jill felt weak for a moment, then twirled around, looking for her husband.
     There he was, standing in the middle of the front room.
     "I ran into the front room, hit him twenty-five times with all my might, and screamed as loud as I could the whole time."
     (pause, thinking) then said, "Did I do wrong?"


     Dear Reader, Did she do wrong?